Practicing Wise Mind
Wise mind is a term taken from Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT). DBT is a therapy modality that is skills-based and focuses on multiple areas of functioning, including emotion regulation, distress tolerance, and interpersonal effectiveness. Mindfulness is at the center of DBT; specifically, mindfulness is the practice of focusing one’s awareness on the present moment, while calmly acknowledging and accepting one’s feelings, thoughts, and bodily sensations. Within the framework of DBT, there are three states of mind.
The first state, reasonable mind, is the state of mind that is logical and scientific; it is “concrete evidence” mode. It is the part of you that plans and evaluates things logically and is ruled by facts, reason, and pragmatics. Emotions (love, guilt, grief) are irrelevant. Reasonable mind can be useful at times; it might help you do things like fill out your taxes, follow a recipe, consider pros and cons, and fill out a spreadsheet. Reasonable mind is known for being “cool-headed” — and yet… If you get stuck in reasonable mind you might just over-analyze, miss the point, or ignore other important considerations. If you’re only in reasonable mind, others may see you as cold and dismissive of emotions, needs, desires, and passion. It’s hard to make and maintain relationships if you are only in reasonable mind. Relationships require emotional responses and sensitivity to other’s emotions. When you ignore your own emotions and treat others’ emotions as unimportant, it’s hard to maintain relationships.
The second state, emotion mind, is that state of mind you’re in when you are fully immersed in emotion. Your emotions are in control and are not balanced by reason; you’re ruled by your moods, feelings, and urges to say things. Emotions are very important to keep us safe, make us aware of our preferences, and bond us with loved ones. Emotions motivate behavior and communicate our needs. Intense emotions fill art, can drive us to complete difficult tasks, and can help us stay passionate about causes and beliefs. However, problems of only being in emotion mind can be when our emotional experiences don’t fit the facts and when our emotions are in control at the expense of reason. Getting stuck in emotion mind can make us feel out of control.
Wise mind is the integration of both reasonable mind and emotion mind; it is defined as “finding inside yourself the inherent wisdom that each person has within.” When you are in Wise Mind, you are considering both emotion and reason in order to make more balanced decisions that take into account both your thoughts and feelings. Some people experience the Wise Mind sense in their body physically — like knowing “in your bones” or heart something is right for you. Others might feel an answer float into their head that just feels right. Every person’s experience is unique, so only you can know what your own Wise Mind says. Everyone has wise mind, even if they cannot access it at a particular point. Each person has inner wisdom; “wise mind” is the mindfulness practice of accessing this inner wisdom.
Written by Ashley Waters, PhD